Coupe crossovers are so hot right now. The BMW X4 and X6 and the Mercedes GLC and GLE dot American roadways like paint lines, inescapable in their omnipresence, but they all have two problems. First, they cut down on cargo space relative to their squared-off siblings. Second, and most importantly, they look like hot garbage.
Few manufacturers get the coupe-crossover right. The Porsche Cayenne Coupe and Ford Mustang Mach-E, with their blacked-out rooflines, actually echo their brands famous two doors — the 911 and Mustang — without sacrificing rear seat headroom. But only one combines practicality and style without a color-specific cheat: The Audi Q8.
Full Disclosure: Audi shipped me out to Utah to drive four crossovers (and ride one mountain bike) all at once. The Q7, SQ7, Q8, and SQ8 have all been lightly updated, and between the smaller changes and shorter drives these reviews likely won’t be the 1,600-word epics you’ve come to expect from my byline. Audi paid for my transportation, lodging, and food.
Audi will tell you that the Q8 is visually inspired by the classic box-flared Sport Quattro coupe, which is believable if you squint. No, harder than that. A little bit more. Are your eyes completely closed? Perfect, don’t the two cars look exactly the same now?
Facetiousness aside, similarities between the two are few. The Q8 has fender flares, sure, and you could convince me that the D-pillar is an intentional homage rather than an aerodynamic coincidence, but styling heritage beyond those two points seems to begin and end at “comes in red.”
While the Q8 may not be a rally coupe, it’s a good-looking vehicle in its own right. So many manufacturers try to mimic coupe lines on crossovers with rear-end curves, but Audi’s angular approach works better. The Q8 will never be mistaken for a 911, but it doesn’t need to be. It looks good for what it is.
From a side profile, anyway. The rear looks pleasing too, but the updated front end for 2024 falls even deeper into the “absolutely no paint allowed ahead of the front fenders” trend that’s taken so many automakers in recent years. Please, I beg you, my life for a front end design that isn’t just All The Grille All The Time.
All that sporty pretension in the Q8’s styling is meant to convince the driver they’re in something other than a 5,000-lb crossover, but the driving experience doesn’t do much to differentiate the car from its three-row Q7 sibling. The coupe-crossover may feel a touch nimbler, but even Audi doesn’t claim a difference from the Q7’s 5.5 seconds to 60 mph.
The Q8 does drop the two-liter base engine from the bigger car, instead starting with the three-liter V6, but it still comes with a cost increase over the Q7’s V6 option. That doesn’t make the Q8 a performance-oriented vehicle, it just means it lacks its sibling’s affordable base-model option.
In coupe-crossovers, however, performance is rarely the actual name of the game. You’re unlikely to see a Q8 at your next track day, unless it’s being driven by a corner marshal, but you may see one fly past you on the highway at unsafe speeds.
At that real-world purpose, the Q8 excels. It’s oddly high on tire noise through its acoustically-sealed glass, but perhaps that’s simply a reminder that you’re in the sporty one. Once the cooled seats kick in, though, and the massagers slowly work out the kinks in your back as you hurtle along your local interstate, you’ll forget all about that.
The decision to purchase a Q8 is entirely an aesthetic one. To consider this car is to recognize that everything in its segment will get the job done, take you and the kids to work and school and Wegmans and back, and them simply choose with your eyes. Is that the mathematically, spec-sheet savvy way to purchase a car? Absolutely not. But if you like what you see, when you park your car and turn back for one last glance on the way into the office, does the spec sheet matter?
