If there’s one problem people have headed into 2025, it’s that they’ve just got too much money. It’s piling up in various rooms and spilling out into the streets, but don’t worry, your pals here at Jalopnik have just the solution: A 1996 Alfa Romeo GTV coupe that’s currently listed for sale on Cars & Bids. Sure, you may be able to get it for a relatively affordable price now, but don’t worry. Once you start having problems with a car that was never sold in the U.S., all that extra money will be gone before you know it.
The haters will scoff, saying it’s just not worth it to own a relatively impractical front-wheel drive coupe with only 148 horsepower and 138 pound-feet of torque. This is America, after all, where four cylinders are only considered enough for half an engine, and front-wheel drive is wrong-wheel drive. Those haters also don’t know what they’re talking about because the GTV was designed by the skilled hands at Pininfarina, the same design house that’s responsible for some of the most beautiful cars ever made.
Imagine being able to tell people you just bought a car designed by the same Pininfarina that gave us the Cadillac Allante, Hyundai Tiburon and the Ferrari motherfuckin’ Mondial. They’ll all be so jealous. Actually, most people probably won’t know the name Pininfarina at all and will probably be incredibly confused why you showed up in an oddly designed European coupe with a transmission you have to shift yourself, but those people don’t matter. “I’ve never seen anything that looks like that before” is just another way of saying, “Wow, I’m impressed you managed to acquire such a rare and impressive automobile. I now think more highly of you and also find you more desirable as a romantic partner.”
As for the car itself, it looks to be in impressive condition considering its age. It has just under 80,000 miles on it, which works out to only a few thousand miles a year, and the list of known flaws is limited to minor chips and scratches, a faded badge and a little seat wear. Oh, and the battery was just replaced earlier this month, so there’s a good chance your new car will at least start the first time you try to go somewhere. After that, though, we’re talking about a 30-year-old Italian coupe, so you’re in for a heck of a ride.
Who even knows what electrical gremlins you might find when you start poking around in there? Then again, that’s just part of the adventure. And there really can’t be many of these coupes in the U.S., so you’ll legitimately be getting a rare car here in the U.S. And hey, maybe once you run out of money, you’ll get the chance to learn how to fix it yourself. If you can find parts, that is. Some may say that’s a bad thing, but again, adventure! What would an adventure be without a few challenges to make it all worthwhile? Exactly.
