For some reason, a lot of people really don’t like the fact that Trump keeps doing everything in his power to turn the military against our own people. And while there have been plenty of normal protests, some of the folks in Portland decided to do things a little differently and held what was billed as an emergency naked bike ride on Sunday in protest. Despite the cold temperatures, Oregon’s Register-Guard reports more than 1,000 people showed up for the two-wheel protest, although not everyone fully committed to the “naked” part of the emergency naked bike ride.
In defense of the people who didn’t go completely nude, the weather on Sunday wasn’t exactly warm and balmy. After all, we’re talking about Portland, Oregon, in October here. Instead, the Associated Press reports it was in the mid-50s and rainy. Even without the rain, it probably still would have been a litte too chilly to ride naked, but throw add the rain into the mix, and naked bodies get way colder way faster. If I remember “Man Vs. Wild” correctly, being wet makes you lose body heat something like 25 times faster than you would if you were dry. Plus, you’d be sticking your bare crotch on a bike seat, which couldn’t possibly be comfortable.
Still, riding bikes is fun, and it certainly doesn’t help that a less-than-conventional protest helps highlight how patently ridiculous it is for Republicans to claim Portland is literally being burned to the ground by hardened Antifa supersoldiers. Will more serious actions be necessary in the future, assuming Trump and other Republicans continue to make up fake excuses to send troops into U.S. cities? Of course. But it also isn’t like the organizers of the emergency naked bike ride thought their protest would magically fix everything overnight. It’s just one part of a larger strategy of resistance.
Riding for human rights
“We’re here today because we strongly believe that we do not need federal troops in Portland or in Oregon at all,” one participant named Ashley told Oregon’s Fox 12. Another protester named Saturn told the news channel, “It is electric, so fun, it’s so Portland. Just keeping everything weird.” The protest also drew in new participants who had never biked naked before, including Ashley, who claimed it was her first naked bike ride, as well as her first Portland protest. “I’ve never done it before, but I’m very excited to be here,” she told Fox 12. “This is actually my first Portland protest, too.”
The fact that they were riding to protest something as important as the Trump administration’s horrific human rights abuses also reportedly made this particular naked bike ride feel special. “This has more impact. We’re doing it for something bigger than just freedom of expression. We’re doing it for human rights,” one participant named Rodney told Fox 12. “We’re all here for something that’s meaningful. I’m very happy and it made the cold and the rain so worth it.”
Meanwhile, Speaker Johnson took a break from sharing his porn history with his son to complain about the protest, calling the naked ride “the most threatening thing I’ve seen yet.” As Oregon Live put it:
On Tuesday, Johnson told the press that he had not seen federal law enforcement “cross the line yet,” but instead, he said, “What I’ve seen is the abuse of law enforcement by radical leftist activists.”
“Most recently,” Johnson went on, “the most threatening thing I’ve seen yet was the naked bicyclers in Portland who were protesting ICE down there. I mean, it’s getting really ugly.”
Though the people behind him appeared to stifle a smile, it does not seem that he was joking, because he went on to say that protesters have attacked officers and people have been arrested.
What a little baby.
