The advice
Your situation is extremely difficult. From what you describe, there seem to be two core problems: your supervisor’s lack of guidance, and their abusive behaviour.
Sadly, your situation is not unique. Many PhD students around the world — regardless of their location or cultural background — have had experiences like yours or heard similar stories.
Nature’s 2025 global survey of PhD students showed that well-being is directly connected to how supportive supervisors are. About 43% of the respondents had experienced some form of discrimination or harassment, but few choose to report it, over fear of reprisal.
In China, where you are, the picture is dismal, according to the survey: PhD students there are significantly less satisfied than are their international peers in many aspects, including supervisor relationships.
Yet, you do have options. Nature’s careers team asked five researchers about your case. Here is their advice.
Know your situation
First thing first, stop fixating on your supervisor’s comments and start looking after your mental health, says Changhee Kim, a researcher in human-resource management at Xi’an Jiaotong-Liverpool University in Suzhou, China.
Talking to people you trust, especially other PhD students, could provide a sense of comfort and perspective, Kim says. Your university’s psychological-counselling service can offer you professional support, too, he adds.
An ‘agony aunt’ for working scientists
It is also important to clarify whether your stress stems from bullying or miscommunication, says Morteza Mahmoudi, a nanoscientist and anti-bullying researcher at Michigan State University in East Lansing. Mahmoudi encourages you — and, indeed, anyone in a similar position — to find out what others in your research group think about your supervisor. “If you feel something, probably other members will feel the very same way,” he says.
Mahmoudi also recommends that you reach out to organizations that deal with academic bullying, such as the Academic Parity Movement — a network of professionals that assists people around the world who have been affected — which he co-founded in 2019. They can assess your situation and offer help, he says.
Finally, document and save all exchanges with your supervisor, in case you decide to take action, Mahmoudi advises. Such communication can include e-mails, text messages and even letters (such as the one you sent to Nature’s careers team) that capture your feelings and experiences. “It doesn’t matter whether the documentation is useful at the time, it may be helpful in the future,” he says.
Culture matters
Although student–supervisor conflicts occur everywhere, one extra hurdle you might face is embedded in your culture, according to Kim. In Chinese — and, more broadly, East Asian — culture, the student–supervisor relationship is heavily influenced by Confucianism, he says, which emphasizes the respect for older and more experienced members of society. “Supervisors are often seen as ‘patriarchal leaders’, and students are expected to be humble and obedient,” Kim adds.
Around the world, supervisors and principal investigators have all of the power in the relationship, from controlling resources to approving experiments, says Sherry Moss, an organizational-behaviour researcher at Wake Forest University in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, and a director at the Academic Parity Movement. But the Chinese cultural expectation of not challenging authority or standing out worsens this power imbalance, Moss says.
The feedback that you received was vague and inactionable, she adds. To find out exactly how your supervisor wants you to improve, you could ask them directly, if you feel comfortable doing so. Seeking concrete feedback in this way is an opportunity to express your desire to improve, she says.
Given the cultural context, Kim says the “most practical and ideal solution” would be to identify your supervisor’s work style and learn to adapt to it: however, in your case, perhaps the relationship has already soured too much because of their abusive behaviour.
You can also communicate with your supervisor in a way “that is difficult to dismiss”, Kim notes. For example, for new research proposals, you can create a complete, structured plan of materials, experiments, timelines and anything else relevant to your work to present to your supervisor, showing them that you have done the work. “This makes it easier for them to give a simple ‘okay, go ahead’ or specific feedback.”
