First!
I’m an early adopter. Whenever there’s a hot new tech toy, I want to clasp it with both hands and hiss “My preciousss” at it. So when one of the world’s largest tech firms announced the Mystery Gadget being offered at a deep discount, you better believe I mashed that preorder button like a Street Fighter combo move.
The gadget is a little white plastic cylinder that looks like a wireless Bluetooth speaker or maybe an Internet router. The instructions say to plug it in and wait for the firmware update and a mass rollout.
No idea what it might do, but I bet it’s AI-powered and it’s going to be absolutely huge. Even if it isn’t, for the price of a fast-food lunch it will have paid for itself in entertainment value.
5 stars
A huge rip-off
If I could give this piece of trash 0 stars, I would. It does nothing. Literally nothing.
The instructions say to plug it in and wait. The manufacturer claims it’s going to change the world. You know what other product made that sort of a hyperbolic claim? The Segway! I bet this will be just as useless.
Update: When I requested a return they refunded my money and let me keep the item, so they get an extra star for that. And I guess I’m a little curious to see the precise way this product launch is going to crash and burn.
2 stars
Not a spatula
I ordered a spatula and they sent me this thing instead. It’s not a spatula!
1 star
Clever scam
No one knows what this thing does but a huge corporation is selling it for what must surely be below cost. And they want us to plug it in! I will bet you anything it’s using your electricity and your home network’s processing power to mint cryptocurrency. The tech bros are going to make a mint (see what I did there?) off of us!
Read more science fiction from Nature Futures
I’m still keeping it plugged in because I figure they might offer profit sharing or something after the big reveal.
3 stars
Perfect for my needs
My spouse informs me that I must buy my worthless son-in-law a holiday present. After exhaustive research, I’ve stumbled upon the perfect gift. Mystery Gadget 1.0 is cheap (just like my son-in-law), takes up space (just like my son-in-law) and refuses to do any work (just like my son-in-law). I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he unwraps this thing.
5 stars
Holidays ruined!
You sent me a broken device. It doesn’t work and now there’s not enough time left to order something that would arrive before Christmas. Thanks for killing Santa, you scrooges!
Update: My son actually liked it. He said it’s not supposed to work yet, which … I don’t really get it? He refused to explain it, and instead I got to learn the meaning of the abbreviation ‘RTFM’. So now my son has no access to his Nintendo for a week. Let’s see how he likes playing with this intentionally broken thingamabob instead.
1 star
Watch the Mystery Gadget teardown!
I run a popular streaming channel where I disassemble the latest cell phones, game consoles, etc. Watch the Mystery Gadget teardown here: [external link removed].
I know others have tried and failed to figure out what the Mystery Gadget does, but maybe I’ll succeed. Be sure to like and subscribe!
4 stars
Décor
I was on the fence about ordering this but then they started offering bundles that, combined with free overnight shipping, make the Mystery Gadgets an irresistible bargain. So I ordered four and I used the cute little contraptions to decorate my living room.
My cats like them.
5 stars
