These Are The Rules You’d Introduce To Fix Flying

Flying sucks, but it doesn’t have to. We’re human beings who can change and grow and challenge rules, norms and regulations. We could start from the bottom and tear the whole apparatus down and build anew if we wanted. So why don’t we? I asked for your best ideas last week on how you would make flying suck less and you, as always, delivered wholesale. 

Some of you wanted to turn back time to a pre-9/11 America and boy, wouldn’t that just solve so many of the problems we’re facing today. Ditto to the commenters who are clamoring for high-speed rail. Why should we fly across the country when you can add just a few more hours and a lot less fuel zipping across the country? Make it make sense. My personal favorite was a zero-tolerance policy for abusing flight crews. Amen to that. 

Scroll through and imagine a better world, a world run by Jalopnik commenters (God help us all).

Assigned overhead luggage bins. I’m over the whole shove it anywhere and act like that’s normal, or the attempt to violate every measurement rule by 3-5″ in every direction.

Seat 13B gets cubby 13B. If bag from passenger in 13B does not fit in cubby 13B, or they have too many bags for cubby 13B, those get gate-checked with a fee.

and

I’ve seen people who’s seat is in row 33 put their stuff over row 10 so they can grab it as they are exiting the plane. Now, people who are in the front of the plane have to find a space somewhere in the back, and have to wait for the whole plane to deplane so they can go back and get their bag when they land.

I say, start normalizing when you find a bag in your overhead bin, pulling it out and handing it to the flight attendant for gate check.

From potbellyjoe and Michael Tonelli

Rules? Let’s start with rules for airline day to day operation. Roll back everything to pre-911, including the formation of the TSA. We have air marshals now, we don’t need the farce on the ground with barely trained people. No more bit paying for anything. No extra charges for seats, baggage, meals, entertainment, cancelling and rebooking. Nothing. It all worked like that before, it can work like that again.

and

I think we’ve hit peak nickel and diming people when we now have two tiers of paying for quicker TSA checks with the Pre-Check and then the “Clear” Pre-Check. One’s like $90 and then you can add to that with the “Clear” lines with additional money. I think it was George Carlin who had the bit about the theater and farce of airport security and having essentially “first class” for TSA security lines is icing on the cake.

and

I used to travel extensively before 9/11. That event was an excuse for the airlines to take advantage of us. I would stroll into the airport 15 minutes before my flight and walk on the plane. No problem. Running late? No problem. No extra charge for a rebooking. I decide I need to catch a later flight or fly out the next day? No problem. No extra charges. You want a refund? Right now, no problem.

From Frank C. and Xavier96 and Rick C.

The easiest way to fix boarding and remove 90% of flight annoyances is to remove checked bag fees and add a fee for second carry-on bags.

You can have a roller bag or a personal item, but not both for free. This instantly solves the fight for overhead bin space, making boarding way faster and reduces the number of people that need to have to stuff things under the seat in front of them, sacrificing the little leg/foot room they have.

and

Never understood the checked bag fee. People try and carry everything on board and then the gate folk offer to check bags ‘for free’ because the plane is full. There is absolutely no incentive for people to check things ahead.

From Leon Grossman and Not Me

Mandate a moon-shot level program for building high-speed rail and regular speed rail across the country. Seriously, if we can spend a billion dollars a day bombing Iran for no discernable reason, we can do this.

The problem with air travel is that it’s the only option for long and medium distance travel. No amount of shuffling who gets seated first will change the underlying fact.

We need another way to get around, especially for medium distance trips. Trains are awesome for this kind of thing. Chicago to Indianapolis is a miserable drive down a miserable stretch of road. Chicago to Minneapolis is like 7 hours of driving but it still seems too short a distance to fly. We need other options. Get more people off the roads on drives no one wants to make. Get people out of the airport who aren’t going cross country or on a business trip.

You can’t fix the airport problem with more capacity any more than you can fix freeway congestion by adding more lanes. We need a second option and literally everywhere else in the world has figured out that that second option is rail.

The US isn’t special, we aren’t too big, we aren’t too spread out. We just have a reflexive need to try and do things our own way, like a toddler trying to put socks on with mittens. Well it’s time to grow up and admit that other people have good ideas and we should maybe try following them.

and

First Class ONLY! Seating, Service, and Clientele.

Make flying so expensive that it is something special again. Improve rail travel for the masses, more routes, more trains. Traveling Coach means Coach!

From Buckfiddious and Radar Lover Gone

Check all bags bigger than what can be stored under a seat. All overhead storage is removed from the plane so adults can stand at their seat. This will make plane loading and unloading much faster and more civil.

From Clay Horste

Eliminate reclining seats. They provide very minimal relief and cause added friction between passengers in an already tense environment. I say buckle up, settle in, and deal with an upright seat like everyone else.

From SVL

There should be a section of the plane for people with small children. And, separating that section from the rest of us, shall be a soundproof barrier that ain’t opening for any reason outside of an actual emergency.

From Give Me Tacos or Give Me Death

Boarding: Very strict boarding procedures, especially for larger planes. Board from the BACK to the FRONT, and do NOT allow anyone to board from a zone they are not called for yet. This means also that the gates need to have enough seating and organized and monitored lines to facilitate a smooth and efficient boarding process.

From ChaosphereVIII

Prohibit “demand pricing”. The price of a ticket shouldn’t go up just because there are fewer seats available. You don’t pay more for a box of corn flakes just because you got the last one.

From Norm DePlume

First is the basic rule: If you are the cause of a disturbance of any kind it’s a lifetime “no fly list” for you.

Second: Really try for an orderly exit when the aircraft arrives at the gate.

Third: The flight crew are not your personal house staff, don’t treat them as such.

Simple, easy rules and common courtesy.

From Jack