In the year 2025, there are simply too many automakers. We don’t need the number of brands under Stellantis, let alone the wide range of companies making cars for the consumer market today. So many of these companies make such similar cars anyway — the herd needs to be thinned, decision paralysis must be solved through a reduction in options. Of course, there’s only one way to thin the herd: Battle Royale.
Every current automaker CEO is placed on a deserted island with a mix of environments — urban, dense forest, sandy beach, a little bit of everything. There are no non-automaker-CEO people on the island, but it’s replete with food, potable water, and weaponry. Only one CEO can emerge victorious, but beyond that there are no rules. Who would you put your money on? Which automaker CEO do you think could beat every other in a battle royale?
There are a lot of strong picks here
Different CEOs are likely to take different strategies here. Ford’s Jim Farley seems like a guy who can get a good rope-a-dope going, exhausting opponents by simply weathering their repeated blows without sustaining any injury. Rivian’s RJ Scaringe, however, seems like a guy who already does some intense martial arts just as general fitness — plus, he’s very likely got that dog in him for combat when the fate of his automaker and his life are at stake. Carlos Ghosn would’ve gotten up to some impressive trickery, but ever since he was ousted from Nissan he’s no longer eligible to participate. Current CEOs only, people.
Who do you think could take home a victory in an all-out automaker CEO brawl? Leave your answers down in the comments, and we’ll pick through our favorites later on in the week. Bonus points for justifications with a good narrative, where you can really explain why you think your pick would be the one to emerge from the island victorious.
