Who Should Buy Maserati?

It probably isn’t the most shocking news you’ve ever read, but apparently, Stellantis is thinking pretty seriously about selling Maserati. The official line is still that Maserati is not for sale, but automakers do have to sell cars to stay in business, and Maserati hasn’t exactly done a great job of that recently. Even with the recent additions of the MC20, redesigned GranTurismo and Grecale crossover, sales were down about 50% in 2024, leading Maserati to lose almost $300 million for the year. So even if Stellantis keeps Maserati, you can understand why some board members want to get it off the books.

In order to sell Maserati, though, Stellantis would first have to find a buyer. There are plenty of options, too. From Chinese automakers to random billionaires and private equity firms, surely someone out there would be interested in Maserati. I mean, yes, Cerberus buying Chrysler went terribly, and private equity destroys everything it touches, but maybe this time, it would be different. The question is, who do you think should buy Maserati?

Now, I know what you’re all going to say. Obviously, Jalopnik should buy Maserati. If there’s any car site out there that should own an exotic Italian automaker, it’s the weirdos who love cars that don’t sell and know nothing about engineering. We do know manual transmissions are awesome, though, and if you put us in charge, I can promise every single Maserati would get a standard six-speed manual. Does that really match Maserati’s position in the market as a company that builds grand tourers? Of course not, but why would we do things the old way when that way didn’t work?

The next order of business would, of course, be to build a Maserati Miata. If Alfa could do it for a while, why wouldn’t it work for Maserati? Every automaker should have a Miata in its lineup. And once all that Maserati Miata money starts rolling in, we could probably afford to make the Miata But Bigger a reality, too. Tall drivers all over the world would be lining up to buy one, which brings us to our next new Maserati, the Miata Shooting Brake. There is no way this plan would fail, and I think we can all agree it’s the best option for Maserati. 

So I guess the actual question for today is who should buy Maserati in the unexpected event that our new owners tell us it’s too expensive, and we aren’t allowed to buy our own car company. BYD? Ford? Cerberus? Let us know your pick down in the comments.