Last week, we told you about a screaming deal one Colorado Fiat dealership was offering on brand new 500es: $0/down and $0/month for 27 months. All a lessee has to pay is the sales tax, which comes out to something less than $1,800. In today’s day and age, that’s about as close to free as you’re going to get, and it spurred on the question I asked you last Friday.
I wanted to know what car you’d only drive if it was free. What car are you so repulsed by that the only way you could stomach driving it was if you didn’t have to pay a cent? Well, you all answered the call with a huge variance of answers.
We’ve got everything from cheap, boring economy cars and entire model lineups to sporty cars with the wrong transmissions and junk from the early 2000s. Some of you even got creative, using the “free” car as an excuse to get an incredibly expensive car for zero money. I see what you did there, and I appreciate your creativity.
Anyway, that’s enough from me. Why don’t you scroll on down and take a look a the cars your fellow Jalops would only drive if they were totally free. Did you notice I said scroll? That’s right baby, no more slideshows.
Ford EcoSport
Even free I would still be disappointed in my self every time I had to drive it.
Submitted by: PDM33
Any Tesla
I’d say a Tesla but you’d honestly have to pay me an awful lot of money to drive one and somehow live with myself for directly supporting this duo
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Any Tesla, and maybe even then most likely I wouldn’t drive it all that much. I truly hate the way they are designed.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate EV’s, just Teslas, I’d gladly pay for a Rivian, Lightning F-150, GMC Sierra EV, Mercedes EQ or anything else but a Tesla.
Submitted by: J-BodyBuilder & Jorge R R Gomez
Jeep Liberty
I haven’t even been in one in decades, but my experience was such dog shit I would never do it again. If someone gave it to me for free, I would only drive it as far as A. a cliff. or B. a car lot. Whichever was closer to minimize time in that hellhole of a car.
Submitted by: Ac_slater
Mitsubishi Mirage
A brand-spankin’ new 90’s econobox in 2024!
Submitted by: OutForARip
Volkswagen ID Buzz
I work for a dealer group that owns two VW showrooms. Every now and then, there are some absolutely absurd employee lease deals, and I’ve said that if we ever get one for the ID.Buzz, I’ll jump on it.
I’m a single dude with a dog – I really have no use for a van like that, and it doesn’t really answer the question because it wouldn’t be “free,” but the deals are so generous that it might as well be, considering the $60k starting price of these things.
Submitted by: Aldairion
Fiat 500e
That one in the picture. Fiat 500. Had one as a rental and absolutely hated it. One of the VERY few cars I’ve truly just hated to drive. Even free would be a stretch to get me to drive one. And I’ve had 3 Minis FYI, love small fun cars. Hate Fiat.
Submitted by: Patrick Baldwin
Ferrari 250 GTO
Define “free”? Is that just purchase price or does that include maintenance and other associated costs? If it includes other costs, I am going with something super rare and expensive since I couldn’t afford it otherwise. I’ll go with a Ferrari 250GTO, I will never be able to afford one and wouldn’t even be able to pay the insurance for a month since I am sure insurance on a car I am driving that is worth $30mm+ isn’t going to be cheap.
Submitted by: Big Block I-4
Hyundai Accent
I actually did get saddled with a free Hyundai Accent. Twice. Hateful little shitboxes (especially the second which didn’t have A/C, and I had to drive for work), but functional enough it was hard to justify spending money for something nicer.
Submitted by: Maymar
Sport Compatcs With Automatic Transmissions
S3, Golf GTI/R, Elantra N, GR Corolla. An automatic defeats the point imo.
Submitted by: James II
Nissan Versa
I had one for a rental and it was awful.
Submitted by: James II
Any Non-Wrangler Jeep
Pretty much any Jeep product that isn’t Wrangler-based. If you’re not driving a Jeep for the iconic look or decent offroad prowess, their whole SUV+CUV lineup is gussied-up, questionably reliable FCA products with steer-and-pray chassis tuning at eyewatering prices.
The Compass is the worst of the bunch…I’m not sure I’d drive it even if I was given one free.
Submitted by: Turbolence1988 Loves Magic Turn Circles
Nissan Kicks
I rented a Nissan Kicks a couple of years ago and couldn’t conceive of spending money for that driving experience.
Submitted by: Angus Wilson
Automatic Mazda MX-5 Miata
Wow, this is a rather apropos question for me. I’ve really been wanting to get a new MX-5, as I had to sell my old ‘96 long ago when my daughter was born. She’s old enough now to ride safely in a two seat car, and I want to get one that I can give to her when she’s old enough to drive. So I really want another black MX-5, an RF 6 speed stick.
But the combination of black, stick shift, GT RF is not as easy to find as I would think. The bulk are automatics, including one here in my town.
Now I know that the auto is more popular and probably easier to sell for the dealer, but I really want a stick, not just for the fun, but partly because when my daughter drives it, no stupid boy will be able to drive it. Though really, where I live, a stick isn’t much fun. City driving and no good twisty roads.
So I kind of wondered just how low they would go for that auto at the dealership. And then I started thinking, “how low would I go? I just have this one car I want, and am I going to be happy with the car I don’t entirely want, even if it was significantly discounted.” I mean, an RF is about $40k, and would I even want this automatic version for even $25k? I really don’t think so.
Submitted by: Joe Sledge
Toyota Corolla
My answer would be have to be the Toyota Corolla. Not because it’s bad. I had one as a rental for four days and found it solid, smooth, and efficient. But I barely remember anything because it was so appliance-like and bland. If bland had an odor you could smell it around the corner downwind, but it doesn’t which is the whole point of being bland, so it doesn’t smell like anything.
I get why they sell a million of these.Well- built, inexpensive, immensely practical. But like, say, Raising Cane’s chicken, the overall quality of the product doesn’t hide the general lack of any real flavor to the experience. It’s built for the masses; a mundane, monotonous, middling product that many, many like but few actually love. Just like Cane’s.
Submitted by: LarriveeC05
Huge Trucks
I used to own a Tacoma and I thought that was too big of a car, so I’d only drive your standard, pedestrian mowing, rural cosplayin’, boulevard queen, big ass american truck if it was free and even then I’d still be embarrassed to be seen in one
Submitted by: WayDude
